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- a spanking game


NOTICE: this game is for grown-ups.    No, really.   
If you are younger than 18, please go away.

 La Main Chaude (Hot Cockles, Mani Calde)  : a game of recognizing who is spanking.

Preparation:

  1. Pick a player at random to be the first one spanked, and one to sit to provide a lap.    The game can be played bare-bottom or not as you like, and either by hand or using a shoe.

Basic play for all rounds:

  1. The player to be spanked is blindfolded, and kneels in front of the sitting player, and puts his face in that player's lap. 
  2. Any player can choose to spank - the spanker delivers one swat, and the player being spanked tries to guesses who it was who just spanked.
  3. If the guess is correct, the player who was guessed correctly takes the place of the spanked player.  
  4. If a guess is not correct, the spanked player is spanked by one player after another until guessing correctly.
  5. If a guess is not correct, the spanked player is not told who it was.
  6. If the sitting player wants to get up, when there's a change, the player who was most recently spanked sits. 
  7. For the spanking of a given player, every player must spank before anyone spanks for a second time.
  8. If no one volunteers to spank, any player who has already spanked points to anyone who has not yet spanked.   That player must spank next.

The game continues:

  1. The game ends when everyone has been spanked - the last player spanked must guess correctly to end the game.

Rule of silence:

  1. If anyone says or does anything which helps the spankee guess who is spanking, the penalty is three spanks.   Any clue which rules out one player as not being the spanker, counts as helping the spanked player to guess who the spanker is.     So for example if while someone is spanking John, Christine and Heather can be heard arguing in the kitchen, then John knows that neither of them is the spanker, and that makes it a little easier for him to guess who the spanker is.    Both Christine and Heather get three spanks for this.

La Main Chaude is depicted in a painting by Rembrandt van Rijn.   and in another by Jean Honore Fragonard,

Kurtág György composed an instrumental solo called "Hot Cockles"

The name is the same in Italian -  "Mani calde", with some regional variations, and it is called "very popular."

The Secret Memoirs of the Courts of Europe: William II, Germany;  by  Mme. La Marquise de Fontenoy
He [Baron von Kiderlen-Waechter] can be grave and dignified on state occasions, and when one sees him at the Court of Berlin arrayed in full uniform, his breast covered with decorations, it is difficult to realize that this imposing-looking diplomat is the principal partner of the autocrat of Germany in such juvenile games as "Hot Cockles," which is a very favorite game on board the Hohenzollern, and in which the kneeling and blindfolded victim receives a terrific spank or smack, and then has to guess, under the penalty of ridiculous forfeits, who it is that struck him!

Kinderspiel {n} mit verbundenen Augen

 Hot cockles is a rustic or childish play, in which one covers his or her eyes, and guesses who strikes him. "One person kneels or lies face downward in the center of the room and is blindfolded." The others in turn tap him on the shoulder, and he tries to guess their names. If he guesses correctly, that person takes his place".     This game corresponds to the Russian game "Zhuchok" ("Жучок").   [  Жучок  means bug or beetle.  Also "bug' as in to bug a phone.   A cock-ring (to preserve your erection) is also called a Жучок.]

Christmas in Britain, 1978 by Jadwiga Lopez, 
Here is a letter that was printed in a magazine in 1711: "I am a Footman in a great Family and am in love with the House-maid. We were all at Hot-cockles last night in the Hall these Holidays; when I lay down and was blinded, she pull'd off her shoe, and hit me with the Heel such a Rap, as almost broke my Head to Pieces. Pray, Sir, was this Love or Spite?"

"Misrule", also "The Lord of Misrule". As W. Skeat mentions,"the lord of misrule" first occurred in 1491, and later in 1503, in the Privy Expenses of Elizabeth of York. The Lord of Misrule acted as the leader, sort of a master of ceremonies, for the Christmas revels. The custom goes back to pagan practice of ancient Rome to celebrate Saturnalia with geat feast in December, around the time of the winter solstice. Everything was turned topsy- turvy. Masters had to serve their slaves, men and women exchanged clothing, and many wore grotesque masks. In medeaeval England Saturnalia became part of the Christmas festivities. Kings and nobles chose Lords of Misrule to reign over entire holiday season, from Chirstmas to Twelfth Night and to use all their imagination - and large quantities of money - to think up games and amusing things to do. Even kings and queens had to obey the Christmas Lord's orders. The custom continued for hundreds of years. (Henry VII and Henry VIII loved it). Usually the Lord of Misrule wore tights and rainbow-hued costume, a swopping hat that had long peacock feathers attached to the crown, a huge ruffled collar circling the neck and an ermine-bordered cape falling from the shoulders. Christmas in Britain, 28-29; Skeat).




 
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- February 2006 -

David Nunes da Silva 




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